Monday, June 20, 2011

If One Of Us Struggles... We All Struggle Together.

It's amazing what being a part of a team can do to a group of people. The bonds that are created just by being a part of that team, may be stronger than most bonds formed today. Even after I left the dance team in high school and moved away, the students that continued to come in, I concidered them family. When Dancers Anonymous started up I was not sure what to expect in terms of what bonds would be made, but I have been pleasantly surprised that it does not matter whether the whole class are kids from the high school or it's a mix of high school and college kids I've barely met. We dance, so that makes us family.

I forgot to mention in my last post that the Lady Gaga class that was held on Tuesday was an important class for our kids. When my dance family found out about my mom's breast cancer, they surrounded me with love, support, hope, and best of all... pink! :) Well, we recently found out that one of our other dance family members has recieved some bad news as well. Her dad has been diagnosed with Lupus in his kidneys which is not a good thing at all. So as a request she asked that her friends and family wear purple on the 14th of every month (14 is her dad's favorite number) to help show their support. I was excited to see that one of our classes was on the 14th so all the kids once again surrounded one of their own with love, support, hope, and this time... purple! What a great blessing to know that it does not matter who we are, who our family is, or what style dance is our favorite, but we can all still get together and support one another in some of the hardest times we have ever had to go through. (So if you watch the video posted in the last blog, you'll see a lot of people wearing purple).

I am fortunate enough to have this job this summer that allows me to not only be surrounded by my friends, but those that I concider my dance family, especially as I begin this struggle with my moms chemo treatments. At the beginning of the summer, I had no idea what I wanted to do when this particular Thursday class came along, but I soon began to realize that my pain and my struggle with watching my mom battle chemo was starting to become a lot harder than I thought it would be. So I began to choreograph to a song by Coldplay called Fix You. After all, all I want to do is fix my mother and make it so she does not have to suffer through these treatments. It seemed perfect. So it was then that I began my journey choreographing how I was feeling, and allowing myself to be completely vulnerable to the song, to me, and to how I felt towards chemo.

When Thursday's class arrived none of the students knew what I had in store for them, but yet they came with their prop in hand. (I'll get to the prop in a second). I told them of the story of my piece and they embraced it whole heartedly. They allowed themselves to be vulnerable with me, and therefore they struggled with me. I have not always viewed myself as the best lyrical dancer, but I do like to choreograph them sometimes when a story hits me, so I knew when people who were actually good at doing the style did my piece, it would be everything it was meant to be. After we finished the piece, it was time to film in groups and add the finishing touch... the prop. I asked them to bring scarves to class, and after they learned the choreography, they used the scarves to wrap their heads like chemo patients often do when they begin to loose their hair. We have just recently started wrapping moms head, so it made the piece even more meaningful for me. Cancer affects so many people these days that it's hard not to be close to the subject in one way or another. Whether my kids have had to deal with a loved one sick from chemo and cancer or not, I would have never been able to tell, because as soon as those scarves were wrapped around their heads, the room changed, the mood changed, and people began to feel deeper about the piece they'd just learned.

There were tears shed, and thank God not only by me. A few students hugged me and cried while they told me thank you for doing the piece and who it reminded them of. Many students simply hugged me to thank me and support me. And one student, Jonathan Martin, told me words that I will never forget because they meant so much to me. "Thank you for teaching this. My mother would have loved it." My automatic response was that he should show her, but then I rememberd him mentioning to me that he had lost his mom to cancer. I felt even more blessed that he joined my class that day. As dancers there will always be a competition of some sort, but when there are moments that mean this much, pieces of work that mean this much, and people that mean this much... we will always bond instead of compete. Thank you to everyone who came to class. Thank you for not only helping me through my struggle, but going through my struggle with me.

Courtney

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